Post by danielchrist on Jan 23, 2007 0:44:54 GMT -5
was emailing coll earlier and the last time i was in a piss about something she told me to put it out on the board and see what sort of advice i got. so here goes. sorry for the emo overtones in advance. the only thing worse that being depressed, is watching people pretend to be depressed....
Well folks, the long and the short of it right now is everything is just in a total state of f**k. I've been getting depressed over the weirdest and stupidest shit and obsessing on it for days on end. My ex-girl who i was led to believe was going to be my girl again all of a sudden doesn't talk to me for a week and then when i finally get ahold of her she says that she has a boyfriend and to leave me alone. f**king bitch.
Another thing that has been f**king with me is that the other night i watched the movie Jarhead. For those that have seen it, and that most of you know my military history it kinda f**ked with my a little on all the shit those guys in the movie had to deal with on being away from home. and I have had to experience about every single one of those things in some form. I mean, how do you go from being 18 with the whole world in front of you to being 25 and feeling like you've already had the pain of a whole lifetime? the military is such a "upright insitution" oh so some say. but in the end they are like most of us when we're done with something. we toss it out and don't really give a flying f**k what happened to it. almost like the end of old yeller. i swear if they could shoot every veteran when they got out to save money on the VA budget they would do it.
My work schedule has been really f**ked. six days a week at nine hour days. sure the money is ok but I don't have any time to just decompress and do anything. so it's been this endless cycle of the same shit over and over. basically i'm beginning to feel trapped by the shit i'm supposed to be doing to make sure the ham and eggs(sorry coll) are on the table every morning. can't go to school because then how would i pay the bills? it's a pretty sad state of affairs.
Friends have been showing their true colors left and right lately. I mean i work six days a week and still have time to email people and ask them how they are doing. Is it too much to f**king ask someone to just email back. if you're busy, email me back and say so. i mean ya read the damn email, you sure weren't busy enough to do that. i'm not asking these people to re-type war and peace, just say hi you cocksuckers. I missed nuke and the living dead's last show. that really sucked. i really wanted to go but i had to work. I think my problem to begin with is a complete lack of anything to look forward to. No big event to plan out, no big concert to go to, no chick that at the end of the day that isn't gonna flake out on me. nothing. it just sucks. all of it. right down to the core this shit is just depressing. And it's becoming hard to pull myself out of it. anyone got any reccomendations?
Well folks, the long and the short of it right now is everything is just in a total state of f**k. I've been getting depressed over the weirdest and stupidest shit and obsessing on it for days on end. My ex-girl who i was led to believe was going to be my girl again all of a sudden doesn't talk to me for a week and then when i finally get ahold of her she says that she has a boyfriend and to leave me alone. f**king bitch.
Another thing that has been f**king with me is that the other night i watched the movie Jarhead. For those that have seen it, and that most of you know my military history it kinda f**ked with my a little on all the shit those guys in the movie had to deal with on being away from home. and I have had to experience about every single one of those things in some form. I mean, how do you go from being 18 with the whole world in front of you to being 25 and feeling like you've already had the pain of a whole lifetime? the military is such a "upright insitution" oh so some say. but in the end they are like most of us when we're done with something. we toss it out and don't really give a flying f**k what happened to it. almost like the end of old yeller. i swear if they could shoot every veteran when they got out to save money on the VA budget they would do it.
My work schedule has been really f**ked. six days a week at nine hour days. sure the money is ok but I don't have any time to just decompress and do anything. so it's been this endless cycle of the same shit over and over. basically i'm beginning to feel trapped by the shit i'm supposed to be doing to make sure the ham and eggs(sorry coll) are on the table every morning. can't go to school because then how would i pay the bills? it's a pretty sad state of affairs.
Friends have been showing their true colors left and right lately. I mean i work six days a week and still have time to email people and ask them how they are doing. Is it too much to f**king ask someone to just email back. if you're busy, email me back and say so. i mean ya read the damn email, you sure weren't busy enough to do that. i'm not asking these people to re-type war and peace, just say hi you cocksuckers. I missed nuke and the living dead's last show. that really sucked. i really wanted to go but i had to work. I think my problem to begin with is a complete lack of anything to look forward to. No big event to plan out, no big concert to go to, no chick that at the end of the day that isn't gonna flake out on me. nothing. it just sucks. all of it. right down to the core this shit is just depressing. And it's becoming hard to pull myself out of it. anyone got any reccomendations?
